Blips.

Life is so much more than the blips that events in a single day, or even a single year, make. If we were able to graph our lives from beginning to end, the line would go up and down, up and down. There would be bad times, and good times, and just whatever times. There would be times that we were able to be good people, and times that we would fail abysmally. But a single event? Or day, or week? It might not even register. Or if it were to register, and we compared graphs, there wouldn't be much difference between us. Human beings are faulty because we can Think about Stuff and Feel Stuff and Think about Feeling Stuff. Mostly human beings think first of themselves, then of their clan, then of the "greater good" when going about the billions of blips that make up a human life.

I can live a life of dramatic pain, in which I am being victimized, or I can compare graphs. The comparison will remind me that we're all just about the same. How can I harshly judge someone else's actions when my own may be just as bad, or worse?

Maybe it's the medication. Or maybe it's that something broke in me, and it turned out that it wasn't a vital part of my being, but something that needed to be emptied of all the vile things I have carried with me all my life. That ancient amphora I've been stuffing full finally smashed to smithereens.

I just need to remember this, not begin to desperately search for the shards, glue it back together. Remember to compare graphs, let humanity be human, and just fucking breathe for awhile.